Muslim sering sesumbar dan berdalih bahwa di tengah iklim poligami pun, istri-istri Muhammad tetap bahagia dan rumah tangganya sakinah, mawaddah dan warohmah. Konon tidak ada ketidakpuasan diantara mereka. Bukti-bukti berikut membungkam mitos tersebut!
Ditempeleng Ketika Minta Uang
Abu Bakar menempeleng Aisyah dan Umar menempeleng Hafsah. Muhammad cuma tertawa:
Jabir b. ‘Abdullah (Allah be pleased with them) reported: Abu Bakr (Allah be pleased with him) came and sought permission to see Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him). He found people sitting at his door and none amongst them had been granted permission, but it was granted to Abu Bakr and he went in. Then came 'Umar and he sought permission and it was granted to him, and he found Allah's Apostle (may peace be upon him) sitting sad and silent with his wives around him. He (Hadrat 'Umar) said: I would say something which would make the Holy Prophet (may peace be upon him) laugh, so he said: Messenger of Allah, I wish you had seen (the treatment meted out to) the daughter of Khadija when she asked me some money, and I got up AND SLAPPED HER on her neck. Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) LAUGHED and said: They are around me as you see, asking for extra money. Abu Bakr (Allah be pleased with him) then got up went to 'A'isha (Allah be pleased with her) AND SLAPPED HER on the neck, and 'Umar stood up before Hafsa and slapped her saying: You ask Allah’s Messenger (may peace be upon him) which he does not possess. They said: By Allah, we do not ask Allah’s Messenger (may peace be upon him) for anything he does not possess. Then he withdrew from them for a month or for twenty-nine days. Then this verse was revealed to him: "Prophet: Say to thy wives… for a mighty reward" (xxxiii. 28). He then went first to 'A'isha (Allah be pleased with her) and said: I want to propound something to you, 'A'isha, but wish no hasty reply before you consult your parents. She said: Messenger of Allah, what is that? He (the Holy Prophet) recited to her the verse, whereupon she said: Is it about you that I should consult my parents, Messenger of Allah? Nay, I choose Allah, His Messenger, and the Last Abode; but I ask you not to tell any of your wives what I have said. He replied: Not one of them will ask me without my informing her. God did not send me to be harsh, or cause harm, but He has sent me to teach and make things easy.
(Sahih Muslim, Book 009, Number 3506)
Ketidakpuasan Atas Poligami Muhammad
Muhammad melanggar sendiri Quran surat an-Nisaa’ 4:3 dengan poligami lebih dari empat. Menurut Qurat surat al-Ahzab 33:51, Muhammad boleh memilih semaunya kapan dan dengan istri yang mana ia mau menghabiskan waktu sekehendak hasratnya. Akibatnya, Aisyah, istri kanak-kanaknya, merasa tertekan atas perilaku egois Muhammad dan betapa gegabahnya si Allah memenuhi kemauan dan nafsu nabiNya:
I used to look down upon those ladies who had given themselves to Allah’s Apostle and I used to say, "Can a lady give herself (to a man)?" But when Allah revealed: "You (O Muhammad) can postpone (the turn of) whom you will of them (your wives), and you may receive any of them whom you will; and there is no blame on you if you invite one whose turn you have set aside (temporarily)." (33.51) I said (to the Prophet), "I feel that YOUR LORD HASTENS in FULFILLING YOUR WISHES and DESIRES."
(Sahih al-Bukhari, Volume 6, Book 60, Number 311)
’Aisha said, "Allah's Apostle used to take the permission of that wife with whom he was supposed to stay overnight if he wanted to go to one other than her, after this Verse was revealed:--
’You (O Muhammad) can postpone (the turn of) whom you will of them (your wives) and you may receive any (of them) whom you will; and there is no blame on you if you invite one whose turn you have set aside (temporarily).’" (33.51) I asked Aisha, "What did you use to say (in this case)?" She said, "I used to say to him, ‘If I could deny you the permission (to go to your other wives) I would not allow your favor to be bestowed on any other person.’"
(Sahih al-Bukhari, Volume 6, Book 60, Number 312)
Istri-istri Muhammad Protes dan Ngambek!!
Umar bin Khattab Menasehatkan Hafsah agar Tabah Bila Muhammad Lebih Menyukai Aisyah
… Then ‘Umar went on relating the narration and said. "I and an Ansari neighbor of mine from Bani Umaiya bin Zaid who used to live in ‘Awali Al-Medina, used to visit the Prophet in turns. He used to go one day, and I another day. When I went I would bring him the news of what had happened that day regarding the instructions and orders and when he went, he used to do the same for me. We, the people of Quraish, used to have authority over women, but when we came to live with the Ansar, we noticed that the Ansari women had the upper hand over their men, so our women started acquiring the habits of the Ansari women. Once I shouted at my wife and she paid me back in my coin and I disliked that she should answer me back. She said, ‘Why do you take it ill that I retort upon you? By Allah, THE WIVES OF THE PROPHET RETORT UPON HIM, AND SOME OF THEM MAY NOT SPEAK WITH HIM FOR THE WHOLE DAY TILL NIGHT.’ What she said scared me and I said to her, ‘Whoever amongst them does so, will be a great loser.’ Then I dressed myself and went to Hafsa and asked her, ‘Does ANY OF YOU KEEP ALLAH's APOSTLE ANGRY ALL THE DAY LONG TILL NIGHT ?’ She replied in the affirmative. I said, ‘She is a ruined losing person (and will never have success)! Doesn’t she fear that Allah may get angry for the anger of Allah's Apostle and thus she will be ruined? Don’t ask Allah’s Apostle too many things, and don't retort upon him in any case, and don't desert him. Demand from me whatever you like, and don’t be tempted to imitate your neighbor (i.e. ‘Aisha) in her behavior towards the Prophet), FOR SHE (i.e. Aisha) IS MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN YOU, AND MORE BELOVED to Allah’s Apostle.
(Sahih al-Bukhari, Volume 3, Book 43, Number 648)
Narrated Ibn ‘Abbas:
that ‘Umar entered upon Hafsa and said, "O my daughter! Do not be misled by the manners of her who is proud of her beauty because of the love of Allah’s Apostle for her." By ‘her’ he meant ‘Aisha. ‘Umar added, "Then I told that to Allah’s Apostle and he smiled (on hearing that)."
(Sahih al-Bukhari, Volume 7, Book 62, Number 145)
Para Istri Sakit Hati dengan Aisyah, Zainad dan Um Salama Protes. Timbul Pertengkaran!
Narrated ‘Urwa from ‘Aisha:
The wives of Allah's Apostle were in two groups. One group consisted of 'Aisha, Hafsa, Safiyya and Sauda; and the other group consisted of Um Salama and the other wives of Allah's Apostle. The Muslims knew that Allah’s Apostle loved ‘Aisha, so if any of them had a gift and wished to give to Allah's Apostle, he would delay it, till Allah’s Apostle had come to ‘Aisha's home and then he would send his gift to Allah’s Apostle in her home. The group of Um Salama discussed the matter together and decided that Um Salama should request Allah's Apostle to tell the people to send their gifts to him in whatever wife’s house he was. Um Salama told Allah’s Apostle of what they had said, but he did not reply. Then they (those wives) asked Um Salama about it. She said, "He did not say anything to me." They asked her to talk to him again. She talked to him again when she met him on her day, but he gave no reply. When they asked her, she replied that he had given no reply. They said to her, "Talk to him till he gives you a reply." When it was her turn, she talked to him again. He then said to her, "Do not hurt me regarding Aisha, AS THE DIVINE INSPIRATIONS DO NOT COME TO ME ON ANY OF THE BEDS EXCEPT THAT OF AISHA." On that Um Salama said, "I repent to Allah for hurting you." Then the group of Um Salama called Fatima, the daughter of Allah’s Apostle and sent her to Allah’s Apostle to say to him, "Your wives request to treat them and the daughter of Abu Bakr ON EQUAL TERMS." Then Fatima conveyed the message to him. The Prophet said, "O my daughter! Don’t you love whom I love?" She replied in the affirmative and returned and told them of the situation. They requested her to go to him again but she refused. They then sent Zainab bint Jahsh who went to him AND USED HARSH WORDS SAYING, "Your wives request you TO TREAT THEM and the daughter of Ibn Abu Quhafa ON EQUAL TERMS." On that she raised her voice AND ABUSED ‘Aisha TO HER FACE so much so that Allah’s Apostle looked at ‘Aisha to see whether she would retort. ‘Aisha started replying to Zainab till she silenced her. The Prophet then looked at ‘Aisha and said, "She is really the daughter of Abu Bakr."
(Sahih al-Bukhari, Volume 3, Book 47, Number 755)
Para istri Muhammad tidak bahagia dengan kondisi rumah tangganya!!
Nafas Muhamad Berbau
Menurut muffasir Quran Abdullah Yusuf Ali, ayat s.66:1 muncul dilatarbelakangi peristiwa berikut:
The Prophet’s household was unlike any other households. The Consorts of Purity were expected to hold a higher standard in behaviour and reticence than ordinary women, as they had higher work to perform… But they were human beings after all, and were subject to the weaknesses of their sex, and they sometimes failed. The commentators usually cite the following incident in connection with the revelation of these verses. It is narrated from Aisha, the wife of the holy Prophet (peace be upon him) by Bukhari, Muslim, Nasai, Abu Dawud and others that the holy Prophet usually visited all his wives daily after ‘Asr Prayer. Once it so happened that he stayed longer than usual at the quarters of Zainab bint Jash, for she had received from somewhere some honey which the holy Prophet liked very much. "At this," says ‘Aisha, "I felt jealous, and Hafsa, Sawda, Safiya, and I agreed among ourselves that when he visits us each of us would tell him that a peculiar odour came from his mouth as a result of what he had eaten, for we knew that he was particularly sensitive to offensive smells". So when his wives hinted at it, he vowed that he would never again use honey. Thereupon these verses were revealed reminding him that he should not declare to himself unlawful that which Allah had made lawful to him.** The important point to bear in mind is that he was at once rectified by revelation, which reinforces the fact that the prophets are always under divine protection, and even the slightest lapse on their part is never left uncorrected.
(Abdullah Yusuf Ali, Holy Qur’an: Translation and Commentary, fn. 5529)
** Allah sekali lagi menegaskan bahwa Muhamad tidak boleh mengharamkan apa yg dihalalkan baginya, alias nabi tidak perlu mematuhi janjinya kpd istriny2 bahwa ia tidak lagi akan berlama2 di rumah Zainab, mencicipi 'madu'.
Aisyah Sendiri Mengatakan, bahwa Muslimah adalah Wanita yang Paling Tidak Berbahagia Dibandingkan Perempuan Manapun!!
Rifa’a divorced his wife whereupon ‘AbdurRahman bin Az-Zubair Al-Qurazi married her. 'Aisha said that the lady (came), wearing a green veil (and complained to her (‘Aisha) of her husband and showed her a green spot on her skin caused by beating). It was the habit of ladies to support each other, so when Allah’s Apostle came, ‘Aisha said, "I have not seen any woman suffering as much as the believing women. [/b]Look! Her skin is greener than her clothes!" When ‘AbdurRahman heard that his wife had gone to the Prophet, he came with his two sons from another wife. She said, "By Allah! I have done no wrong to him but he is impotent and is as useless to me as this," holding and showing the fringe of her garment, ‘Abdur-Rahman said, "By Allah, O Allah’s Apostle! She has told a lie! I am very strong and can satisfy her but she is disobedient and wants to go back to Rifa’a." Allah’s Apostle said to her, "If that is your intention, then know that it is unlawful for you to remarry Rifa’a unless ‘Abdur-Rahman has had sexual intercourse with you." Then the Prophet saw two boys with ‘Abdur-Rahman and asked (him), "Are these your sons?" On that ‘AbdurRahman said, "Yes." The Prophet said, "You claim what you claim (i.e. that he is impotent)? But by Allah, these boys resemble him as a crow resembles a crow,"
(Sahih al-Bukhari, Volume 7, Book 72, Number 715)
Hihihihi….rumah tangga nan berantakan!!
Muhammad suami yang tidak fair, diskriminatif & gagal mencegah rasa iri diantara istri2nya.